It’s a jungle out there

Flight #2 to Tanzania:

It’s technically 3:30 in the morning in new york… I haven’t slept at all. My gate was what seemed like miles away from where I was dropped off and this bag is sooo heavy! I ended up sitting outside of my terminal for hours and texted the one person I knew would be awake.. And my mom.

This woman, this blonde, pale skinned, woman in a blue flowy dress with a lot of beads and jewelry ( you can tell we’re from all the countries she’s ever been to) approached me and say on the floor next to me and simply just talked. She had to have been about 60 years old an she had soo many stories about her adventures and life experiences. She always traveled alone and was now on her way to Tanzania from Los Angeles. She was on her way to go on a 10 day Safari in the Serengheti with people she ha never met before.

Now, while talking to this woman I couldn’t tell if she was the coolest person I’ve ever met or the craziest. She kept yelling at the people in front of her blaming them for cutting this imaginary line she made up in her head. She also claimed that I could be her daughter….I never knew her name.

I also met this girl named Morgan who was traveling to Tanzania from Boston. Morgan is 20 years old and spending 3 months there for a study abroad program. She’s never been out of the country either.

I’m already starting to feel less alone than I had thought.

I said goodbye to my new friend Ed.

It’s a Jungle Out There

It only takes 20 seconds of courage to change your life.- Day 1

I said my farewells and packed all of my things to begin a journey I used to only dream of.

I’m alone.

Completely alone.

Now this wouldn’t be that difficult to someone who is used to being alone or someone who has a lot of personal space, but I’m not one of those people. I have been blessed in life with an amazing ground of friends and a very loving family. I don’t know what it’s like to be alone.

I’ve talked to so many people about doing this trip with me, but when it came down to it, they couldn’t go for whatever reason. I can’t spend my life waiting around for everyone else. you need to make things happen for you.

THIS IS BY FAR THE MOST SIGNIFICANT THING I’VE EVER DONE

Oh, by the way, I’m on a plane right now heading to Tanzania, Africa with a layover in Amsterdam. This ride in total will take me approximately 19 hours. My hands are shaking.

I’ve never been outside of the country before, I’ve never been outside of a 10 mile radius of someone I know. I’m a person you can contact 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. I send about 700 text messages in a week and work 60-70 hours a week.

This journey began with the click of a mouse. A simple “charge to card” and I was locked in. No refunds. No exchanges. I reached out to family, friends, and acquaintances to get moral support from those important in my life. I held a fundraiser, which i’ve never done nor knew how to, I’ve never done anything like this. January 29th, seemed so far away, came so quick. Here I am, sitting on a plane watching Modern Family on my way to experience something larger than life.

I’m sitting in seat 43 J and there’s this young Asian man sitting next to me. He asks where I’m from (I know mom, don’t talk to strangers) but he seemed harmless so I shared. Turns out he’s from New Jersey and he’s a medical student heading to Tanzania to volunteer at a hospital. What are the odds of that??! Two people traveling alone, first time out of the country, going to volunteer in the same area when theres a 4 hour layover in Amsterdam with transferring flights. This guy was so cool. We played video games and just talked about life, love and lack of and the simple things in life. It’s funny, all of my anxiety of being alone through this whole ordeal disappeared. All because this guy sitting next to me on a flight full of hundreds of people was experiencing the same thing I am.

His name is Ed

Right now we’re over the UK, not too far from Amsterdam. It’s pitch black out my window, Ed is reading over my shoulder… he assumes I’m writing about him, I haven’t slept at all yet, It’s 5:30 in the morning, and I have no idea what I’m in for. All I know, is this feeling I have, this fear of the unknown, this gut-wrenching feeling is what I live for.

Update

Hello everyone, i recorded this song “fraud” hope everyone likes it! I’ll be in the studio next week finishing “keep on breathing”! Can’t wait till you all hear it!

Www.chasethemusic.net

Fraud

So I wrote this song very last minute. When I started playing the chords the words just seemed to flow out of my mouth. It was at a time in my life when I seemed to be adored by everyone but no one actually knew me. I couldn’t keep up with everyone, I didn’t have the time and I felt awful cause I was doing everything I possibly could. Take a listen to ” fraud” let me know if youve ever been there.

Energy

For me, music is a release of energy. It’s all emotion, the kind of emotions you have no control over. The kind of emotions you can’t get a grasp on and you become someone you never thought you could. It’s your inner you. It’s the you you have to let out every once in a while or you’ll either die or go crazy from all your built up emotions. It’s the only form of control I’ve ever known.

Fedora!

Sometimes I feel like wearing a Fedora… i feel more sophisticated.

Africa

So I’m going to Africa at the end of January. I really don’t talk about it but as the days go on I’m getting more and more nervous. This is my first time out of the country, and I’m going alone. Theres a mixture of emotions that I’m feeling as it gets closer and closer. It’s exciting, nerve wrecking, scary, unsettling, but also uplifting. It gives me so much to look forward to. I can’t wait to work with children from another country.. in a place where they have nothing. This experience is going to be so rewarding in so many ways. Life is about taking chances, taking risks. Don’t let anyone discourage you from things you want to do. I had a lot of people giving me all sorts of reasons not to go. Their reasons may seem valid, but essentially its my choice and I really don’t appreciate negative opinions. It’s your life, live it how YOU want to.